Pivoting and building

In this episode of The Kindling Project, Kisha brings her down-to-earth energy. Kisha is steadfast, real, and honest. She shares how her journey began with her business partner Jen Langen and took some devastating and unexpected turns. We ride the rollercoaster of learning how to pivot, let go, grieve, move on, and show up for ourselves and others. Kisha is transparent in the challenges and barriers she faced while building a successful pilates studio in Southeast Michigan. Through the ups and down, Kisha’s story will inspire you to keep showing up for yourself and others in the face of adversity. Kisha has transformed the pilates industry by creating a “come as you are” space where students feel welcome and not judged. Be prepared to want to try a class while feeling empowered that you can do anything when life throws you lemons. Check out Warehouse Pilates at: https://warehousepilates.com/.

Learn more about The Kindling Project at our website: https://www.thekindlingproject.com/ and join our Facebook group for women looking for that extra kindling to start their subsequent big fire! The Kindling Project - Ignite. The Kindling Project is sponsored by Memora, an experience design agency that creates memorable brand experiences. Memora is offering our listeners a FREE 30-minute brand consultation. Schedule yours now.


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  • Melissa: Welcome to the Kindling Podcast today's guest is our friend, Kisha Quinn, who is the owner of Warehouse pilates. She has a successful Pilates studio in Northville, Michigan, that she opened in 2016 and she's on the cusp of opening a second location. She's also a wife and a mother, and she had a career in supply chain logistics for Pepsi, and she just has a lot to share with us today about opening a business, a health related business, and about keeping yourself healthy.

    Welcome, Kisha!

    Kisha: Thank you! Thank you for having me.

    Melissa: Oh, we're so glad.

    Amy: So I just wanna have a disclaimer here with Keisha because Keisha and I met- okay and as an FYI, I've been very weepy. So there may be a, just a little bit of weepiness happening with Jack going to college and transitions. But I met Keisha, when did we meet? Our boys were- John michael was-

    Kisha: They were five and I'll never forget this, they were at the pool and they would meet at the pool. And I had so much anxiety about John Michael, starting this new school or in new, in this neighborhood, starting this new school. It was so cute to me. Rock was like, okay, Jay, I'll see you at the cafeteria as if-

    Amy: That was the place.

    Kisha: That's the place I'm gonna see you at the cafeteria. And at that point I was like, okay, he is gonna be fine. He has a friend. He's gonna be good. So that's what they were, five.

    Amy: Wow. And now they're 20. John Michael will almost be 20 Rocko just turned 20. So you and I have a long history of a kinship raising boys and really being very similar in a lot of ways. I didn't realize that you and I are one year and one day apart. And you're really close to your sister. You have an incredible sister. I just adore you. And I'm so glad that you're here. So I'm excited for the people that are listening to get a chance to get to know you too. Because you are very much like a silent storm, like you're here, but there's a lot going on and you don't wanna mess with that storm either, just for the record. Don't even go there people.

    Kisha: That's funny.

    Amy: One of the things Keisha that Melissa and I like to talk about with our guests is their kindling project. And how we've defined a kindling project is really igniting and helping fuel that flame within. And, we speak from a lens as a woman because oftentimes we have these flames, but these flames aren't always ignited because we put things on hold because of motherhood or family commitments or career commitments, all these reasons why we put everything on hold. And so one of the reasons we're having you here today is because you've had a kindling project and I'm sure you've had many. The one that we really wanna know more about is your warehouse Pilate studio, because it is such a unique niche of exercise for one thing, there's an incredible history with Pilates. And, we wanna know more about maybe when that flame started for you in terms of wanting to become an actual business owner, because you had been active and fit and an avid exercise woman, but tell us how this all really came to be for you, please.

    Kisha: Yeah initially I think it starts with my journey of finding Pilates. So after I had John Michael, I lost the mommy baby weight, but I was still fluffy. Like how the fluffy parts, how you can't quite seem to get to. So a girlfriend recommended that I do- I think it was a Windsor Pilates video. Cause it was, back then there were a lot of workout videos, so I started doing that and I like it, and then I went to lifetime not to pilates class, and I liked it. And at that point I was just doing like basic map foundation stuff. And then once you like something and it's interesting to you, you start wanting more and more of it.

    So I went- I found this equipment studio, a reformer studio in Birmingham. And I was like, this is great. I love it. I need more of it. So I started taking Pilates when John Michael was about, I don't know, six months old, practicing Pilates. And through the years, I would always tell Mike I'm like, I really want to become compliance instructor, but because I'm a mom, full-time mom at this point. Cause at that point I left my, I left work to be a full-time mom, and which I have lots of advice and conversations about that with young women, but it's a different story. So at some point I'm, then I go back to work. John Michael, by this time is three. I go back to work, but I'm still trying to take my Pilates.

    I'm still loving it. By this time, then we move, we have a corporate move. We move to Illinois and I'm still full-time mom, I'm still trying to do my Pilates. So we get back here. I start working for a British beverage company and I was with the company for maybe a year and a half, and then I get laid off and I'm like, who gets laid off at 40? And that just rocked my whole world. I've been doing this whole thing for how many years, and now I get laid off? So Mike said he suggested since you've always wanted to do pilates training, go do it. You have nothing but time, John Michael's now in third grade, go become a- do your certification.

    So I did. And at that point I realized that I could be, I could stay in this space and always bend to the whim of someone else, or I could just go create my own. Fill my own house. You can be a renter or you can be an owner.

    Amy: Was this after the training or during?

    Kisha: It began to become pretty clear during the training and then I'm, I'm working and I'm like yeah, I need my own.

    I need my own space. Because at that point you have your own feelings, your own ideas of how you want your space to feel how you want people to be, people to feel. How you want people to be treated. And so, you can't make somebody switch theirs, just go get your own. So that's what I did. And I happened to- this takes me to my partner Jen Langen.

    So Jen and I out enough, because we're both people who love to work out. We met at a TRX class and-

    Amy: Oh, wow.

    Kisha: Yeah. And that's how we met. And so we were always running to each other at TRX classes or some random bootcamp. So she was at the same Pilates studio that I was working at. She worked there and I remember asking her I really wanna open a studio, do you wanna do it with me? But the time wasn't right for her, she said oh, that's not right. So let's say about a year and a half, two years in, after I've become, I'm an instructor and I'm working at all these different places and different studios around area, she called and she said Hey, you wanna open studio?

    It wasn't even a, let me think about it, it was absolutely I've been waiting for you to call me.

    Amy: Oh, I love that.

    Kisha: Yeah, so we embark on this crazy journey of opening a studio and we had him with a partner. Her name was Annie and just did it. We had a goal of that we wanted our space to feel inclusive because I think for so long, Pilates has not been inclusive in exercise.

    We wanted it to be affordable because we all know Pilates was never affordable. And we wanted our space to be a second home and a place of healing for so many people. So when you come into the studio, it's a very warm space. You feel like your family there, a lot of friendships have been created. Bonds have been made.

    Healing has happened, we've had people come in, like they've lost partners, they've lost spouses, they're fighting cancer. They're healing from these things. They've lost children. Their children are having their own, but it's a safe space. And that's, what's always been about, we have rocked babies, new moms took classes.

    We've sat there and pet your dog because your dog is anxious and we won't let you leave or teaching classes, but that's our space. And that's what we wanted. And it was for the community. That's how we got there.

    Amy: That's incredible. And I think what's unique about your story is with Jen, that you believed in her and she believed in you and that you knew. I told you I'm getting emotional, cause there's more to this story for everybody. To hear what Jen, you two believed in each other and you like for you to not have hesitation that says a lot.

    Kisha: Yeah.

    Amy: That says a lot. You're like, because I know you enough to say, oh, if you're believing in it, you're in 110% if not, there's not even question. You're just gonna turn around and walk the other way. Yeah. So for you too, to have that connection or that synergy, there's a lot to be said for that. That's when I always know that God works in ways that we can never predict or-

    Kisha: Absolutely.

    Amy: So if you will take us a little bit more down that road, you two came up with this space, especially coming into Northville, Michigan. So people that Northville- most people don't even know where Northville is, right?

    Kisha: Yeah,

    Amy: but it's a very- how do we describe Northville?

    Kisha: It's a bedroom community. Yeah, it really is. It's a very quiet- I feel like it's almost if you know about it, great. Like you've been letting on secret

    Melissa: Yeah.

    Kisha: And I laugh, like when I watch the news and something randomly says in Northville, Michigan, I'm like, turn it off. We don't want to know we're back here! It's-

    Amy: Exactly. Don't tell anyone.

    Kisha: It's our own little secret back here, but it's a community that's very supportive of what is brought to, so I always laugh. You can bring the best restaurant or the worst restaurants, people are gonna go because they want to support what's in that community. They want to be able to walk from their homes and go, "so that's Northville". I like it. It's been good.

    Amy: Yeah. And just as an FYI, Northville is about 30 miles west of Detroit.

    It's not like we're in the middle of nowhere. There's a lot going on around us. Although some people might think that there's not a lot going on around us. So tell us, you opened your doors August, 2016 at warehouse Pilates.

    Kisha: So we opened August 26th, 2016, and I can remember looking so we had our first week.

    And I remember looking at Jenna, Annie, I'm like, oh my God, we've gotta do this every week? Every week we've gotta do this over and over again.

    Amy: it's funny.

    Kisha: And that was like, when that panic set in oh my God, I've gotta, we've gotta keep producing. And at that point, either you have to stop and say what we're doing is working, but always leave yourself space to tweak and pivot. And the pivot is what has saved us so many times.

    Melissa: And they were pretty big pivots, it's not like this story doesn't have some big twists and turns.

    Kisha: Yeah. It gets a little emotional. So August, 2016, 2017, we're humming along, but we're about nine months in and at this point life's beginning to change for everybody.

    So Annie wanted to go back to California. Or Las Vegas where she was from, but she'd gone through a divorce. Okay. I get that. You wanna go back home? So Jen and I fully supported her going back home and buying her out of the business. So that was right about the time that Jen started not feeling well. And we would always joke cuz she had her right eye. Every time she would smile, she would squint, and we had so many jokes oh my God, you have a lazy eye. Oh my gosh, can you see me? We had all many, so many jokes about this squint. The squint, it began to hurt. It really began a lot of pain and she thought she had eye infection and then respiratory infections.

    Unfortunately, she had a very rare form of cancer that was in the back of her eye, her right eye. And doesn't get easy. No. So she fought like hell to say for herself or her children. She really did. People say a heroic fight. It was really- that's exactly what it was, because it was not, she was not supposed to live as long as she did.

    And the midst of all of this, I'll never forget. It was April 10th. Why the date sits in my head. I do not know, but April 10th she tells me that it's terminal. And I have to tell her that we're moving to Texas. For work.

    Melissa: How many years in of the business is this?

    Kisha: So now we're about a year and a half, two, almost two years in.

    Melissa: And Annie has left.

    Kisha: Annie has left.

    Melissa: And you have to take a relocation to texas.

    Kisha: Yeah. And she's fighting for her life.

    Melissa: And she's fighting for her life.

    Kisha: Yeah. And in the midst of all that, even before the move, like there would be days and Mike, my husband will tell you, I would get up so exhausted. Cause I'm trying to keep it all together.

    Trying to keep it together for myself, but more importantly for our clients, because at that point, our clients saw me as a conduit, like of information coming in every day. Yeah. Reassuring them that everything's gonna be okay. When you know that it's not gonna be okay, so April, 2018, we move, we- I'm sorry we move in June. And at that point, Jen and I are this is hire, hire a studio manager. We hire Brenda and I'm in Texas. And I realized once I got there, I have, I've been holding my. like holding my breath because I was holding it together for everybody else. I wasn't allowed to just exhale when you have everybody looking at you.

    So I get to Texas and that's when I realize that okay, you can let it all out. But the air out. And we went through it. I went through this move. I did this, and managing a business knowing that Jen was sick, knowing that she was no longer an active partner. Now I have a studio manager who I'm getting to know. I'm trying to keep a business together from 992 miles away. It was very challenging, but at the same time, being in Texas as much as people, everybody knows, Texas was taxing for me, it was liberating. Because I could leave my problems behind.

    Amy: Yes. Yes. And that's not something that comes natural for you because you are all in.

    Kisha: Yeah.

    Amy: Gosh, this is who would've thought this is gonna be a tear jerker session.

    Melissa: Oh I thought this was gonna be a tear jerker.

    Kisha: Yeah.

    Amy: The other caveat too, Keisha, is that you also had a high schooler that you're trying to adjust and adapt into high school. He was a junior I believe?

    Kisha: He was a sophomore. He hated us.

    Amy: Oh, he was a sophomore. That's right. That's right.

    Kisha: Do I blame him? No, because when we were here, he was at a high school he didn't love. And then all his dreams were coming true, he was gonna transfer to CC. He was gonna be with his friend and he was so excited. And so as if I'm pulling, ripping bandaids off of everybody's life, we tell him we're gonna move to Texas. And so he's devastated. I'm devastated. Mike is just trying not to be the bad guy. And like I said, we get to Texas and he had a rough six to eight weeks of I'm angry, I'm sad. He went through a range of emotions.

    So I'm now I've left one thing back, but I have something else that I've taken with me another set of sadness. Because you see your child in pain and disappointed and you're hoping that you've made the right decision for everyone involved in saying yes, you're saying yes to everybody's life choices where, and it may not always be your own.

    So at the end of, I should say the best part about Dallas is that my son had the most amazing high school experience. It was a storybook high school experience. It's exactly what you would want. What every parent wants their child have. So I'm thankful for that, but in the process of getting to that, there was a lot of just messiness and ugly.

    So we're there 2018. We get there August, 2018 and Jen was diagnosed April 10th. Jen passed away in March 28th, I think.

    Amy: Yep.

    Melissa: That's less than a year after the diagnosis, you lose her?

    Kisha: Yes. And it was like, how do you go from perfect person who is perfectly healthy, right? Like you and I. She eats protein bars because we're all trying to stay slim. Gets sunlight, cuz she wants to stay slim, not knowing that at the end of the day, whatever God has created for us it's gonna be for us. So if we know the old adage of, before we were born, we were formed, it's already written for us.

    Amy: Yeah. Yeah.

    Kisha: It's the journey that we must all go on. So she passed away in March and I remember coming home, I tried to take a class in the studio and I couldn't. Because this was no longer for me, a space of happiness and safeness. It was constant reminders of yes, this person and this woman that, that we all love so much.

    But once again, I remember coming- I went, came home for the, came back to Michigan for the funeral. I go back to Texas. I'll never forget this. My poor husband, God bless him. He earns his wings like many times over.

    Amy: He does as he should because-

    Kisha: He's outside cleaning the car and the car service drops me off from the airport. And I said, just so you know, going to Paris in October. And he's like what?

    Yeah. I'm gonna learn how to make croissants. And I'm going to Paris in October, because at that moment, I realize how many times do we plan for something, how many times do we say next year? And I'm gonna do this, I'm gonna do this. I'm gonna do this. And we never get to it. Our, my friend never got to it. I can remember asking her. I said, okay. So if you could eat anything today, what would it be? It was a cheeseburger, the very things that we run from because we're always trying to stay slim. She's like a cheeseburger. So at that point, I decided that I was going to live the life that I have. We don't know how many more summers we have on this planet. So I'm just gonna live. A good life.

    Amy: Yes.

    Kisha: And my child then comes along with a good life. My husband comes along with it. My nephew, everybody just goes, I'm like, we're gonna do this. And that was what I did. And I miss her deeply. There'll be times when I will have the funniest story that only she's gonna appreciate. And I start laughing. Or even if I'm teaching in a class. And I'll say something like you can do anything for 60 seconds. I will start chuckling because that's something she would say. Bringing it full circle, her daughter now comes to the studio and it just warms my heart.

    Amy: Yes.

    Kisha: Because there had to have been a journey for Joanie to be able to come. At what point was it for her that she said I can now walk into the space. And I'm very protective of her if she's my own, but that's it. So that's the full circle, but all the in between has been messy and gut wrenching and beautiful, and we've had lots of funnies, we've had tears, pandemic. Huh.

    Melissa: How did you take what was, to use our term, the kindling project of the warehouse pilates that belonged to you and Jen, and then allow that to continue to grow in Jen's absence. How did that continue after you lost her and how did it evolve or did it evolve?

    Kisha: I think there's beauty in every sadness, right? And you began to see it really through during the pandemic. So the whole world is shutting down, right? So now we're almost a year to when she passed away. When the pandemic- we always joke remember that day on March 17th, we said the studio is gonna be close for two weeks and we're close for six months, everybody, that's our joke, right?

    Melissa: Right.

    Kisha: But during that time, that's when it was important that this Kindling project that we created was so important to us, that we said was our reasoning that we said was, this is why we're doing it. It was time to put on full display. So whereas you would have to do what during the- everything shut down, people are not working.

    People are not bringing in money, that you would still have online platforms that were charging people for classes. People didn't even have money coming in. So how can you say that you're here for wellness, mental, and physical wellness and community, when you're now I'm still gonna charge you? So that went all the way back to our why I wanted to open the studio. We want it to be for the community and then being for the community, we wanted to be able to support wherever they were going, whatever they were, what was happening. And so we never charged. For classes during the pandemic. So if we had online classes, if you wanted to send a tip to your instructor, send a tip to your instructor and the money would be sent to them, but it was always free because that was why we wanted to support. And even to this day, that's where we are. That is what we have carried on. That is what I have carried on. That's what Brenda, who's my new partner we've carried on. It's supposed to be for the community. It was never about the money. It was never about any of that. It was always about women who just wanted to create for the community.

    Amy: Yeah, and really Keisha that's what's sustained it because, it can be so easy to think about paying bills and financial hardship and being financially insecure and owning a business and having rent. And we know that the location is amazing where you're at, but it, we know it's also not cheap because it's, again, it's Northville, it's prime property.

    And the fact that you stuck to your why is really admirable and that's, what's been probably that thread that's- or that flame, we could say, that's kept it going because you do have the people now that do become clients, or what do you call your students?

    Kisha: Our clients, but so many of them are our friends, of where, we all get together. They're our friends, it's our community. It's, everybody has a safe space.

    Amy: And you've kept that, and especially during the pandemic, because I know that fitness studios, there were some still charging people memberships and all this kind of, this stuff.

    Melissa: But many of them, a lot of 'em also lost their business during that time. There's a fair amount

    of Stu-

    Kisha: yeah.

    Melissa: I see these exercise places. Oh yeah. Wasn't that a fit CrossFit or something. And then the storefronts empty now.

    Kisha: When the lockdown happened, I never said we weren't gonna make it always knew we were gonna make it. That was never- and it was funny because I, like I said, I still have very full conversations with Jen. and I remember having that conversation, like this is gonna be fine. We're gonna be okay. People would ask me when I was in Dallas, why don't you open a second studio in Dallas? And I was like, because I didn't realize that she was my safety net. I didn't realize that I was like, I can't do it without her, so I won't do it at all. And it took me, it took it- god does everything when he's right for you to do. So the opportunity had presented itself to be like, you can do this. She's always there, her husband's with me. So that's why now we're coming to studio number two, that failure has never been an option. And if your why is rooted in goodness, you're not gonna fail.

    Amy: Okay, so Jen passes away March of 2019. You're in Dallas. Bring us to when you come back, finally, thank you, Mike, for bringing you all back to this area.

    Kisha: Oh, it's so funny because. I know, I was like

    Amy: Poor Mike.

    Kisha: So I remember saying we were like two years in, at this point and I said to Mike, when John Michael gets his diploma, we're leaving. That can be a we all three of us or we two of us and the dogs, but Jay and I we're out right in the midst of that, my house floods I'm fighting like insurance companies. I'm telling you lots.

    Amy: Of course,

    Kisha: like a story of Joe-

    Amy: Noah's Ark.

    Kisha: So much.

    Amy: You're like, just bring it on people,

    Kisha: Right I'm like, what else can it be at this point?

    Amy: And the Dallas heat, of course, it's-

    Kisha: Yeah. So he graduates in may and I remind him at graduation May 22nd, we're leaving. And I tell the contractor, who's been trying to put my house back together. I said, this house is going on the market on July 5th. He's but it's June 1st? I said then you have 33 days to get it together.

    Cause I'm leaving. So I think that's when he realized that she really is a taskmaster and put this house back together. We took pictures, July 5th, we listed July 6th. We sold it July 8th and the moving truck was there August, I think, 11th to bring us back to Michigan.

    Amy: That's amazing. That's amazing.

    Kisha: Yeah. And Mike, at that point he was already like, I'm not, I'm gonna retire. So we were coming back to what? We had no-

    Melissa: Yeah, what was the next step?

    Kisha: We had no house. We had a rental. So Mike made the decision, which was good. He'd been at Pepsi for 40 years. He was like, I'm not ready to stop working, but I'm ready to be done at that phase of my life. And so he works for a startup now. So that's been good. Boy has- I call John Michael boy, so boy is now settled. He is in college as with other kids and he's coming to his second year and we still don't have a house, but we'll find one eventually. And now we're getting ready to open a second studio in south.

    Amy: So I'm curious, Keisha. When you came back, it was almost like you're again, you're I keep feeling in hearing the word pivot because you had to turn around and now you're here. You're planted here at least, for a while here, this is where you're planted. This is where a big chunk of the family is, this is home, and you can still travel things like that, but this is also where your business is. And so at what point did you- I don't wanna say reinvest because that I don't wanna imply that you weren't invested before, but at what point did you say this is my commitment? I'm in it with Warehouse Pilates, tell us how that, because you, your flame dimmed really, but it, you had life going because this is what happens, life happens. And so you come back and now there's this whole new purpose in a lot of ways. So tell us how that whole flame reignited in regards to warehouse Pilates and the dream of opening up a second studio.

    Kisha: It never, I don't know if the flame dimmed but I realized that there were a whole new set of clients and family members to our studio that only knew me from an email because when I was in Texas, I would do all the emails, manage all the finances.

    And so I was just this computer, nobody knew who I was. I remember coming to the studio for the first time after being gone in August and I'm taking a class, just taking a class randomly, then I go sit behind the desk and someone says, do you work here? Who are you? And why are you sitting behind that desk? And I had, that's where I realized I had to intro reintroduce myself-

    Melissa: as the business owner!

    Kisha: Yes.

    Melissa: That's why.

    Kisha: Right. Or I'm like, I'm key showing up. Oh, we've gotten emails from you. So from that standpoint, when I think I can honestly say I knew from the very beginning, when we first opened the studio, there would never just be one.

    I just thought that I would have my sidekick Jen with me for my number two and number three. Because even when she was sick and did not understand how sick she was, I was still looking through spaces. I had no idea texas was gonna happen. I had no idea she was gonna, it was gonna be this bad. We were looking for spaces in the area and being true to form, she said you just go ahead, do what you want, I'm here for it. So you have somebody who gives you the room just to flap your wings. That's a beautiful thing, right? So it was just one, I didn't know that all this was going to happen. Two, I knew that it was the plan of God, because had we tried to open in 2016, 2017, would it have been as successful? I don't know, would it have failed? No, would it have been as successful? I can't say it would've. So everybody has people have to stop and understand that when you go, why aren't things working the way I want them to work. Why aren't they just happening when they need to happen? So because they're not supposed to.

    Melissa: And they never do. I don't think in my experience, we get a lot of choice in how they unfold. We can make the best plans and then we just have to adapt and adapt when they don't work out quite how we had planned.

    Kisha: Yeah. And we have to understand that we are protected. Now, you can believe what you wanna, who you can believe in whatever you want to believe in, but whatever you believe in is protecting you. Sometimes I would say it's protecting me from myself, because I can be a bull in a China shop. So protect me from myself. And so here we are now and we're coming into two and in studio two, we still take with us our basic principles and our why, the why doesn't change. We're just now sharing the why with other people.

    Amy: Yeah. I love that insight and that I would call it emotional maturity to say protect from ourselves, because when we are strong and driven and overachieving, I- there's gotta be another word for that, but when we just, we want it all and we want it all tomorrow, but we also will work for it and all this stuff. It can be hard to say, okay this is what it's gonna be today. And that's perfectly fine. It doesn't have to be everything in this moment, and you're right. It is a lot of protection from self and there's something to be said for that because oftentimes for women, we think it didn't work so I failed and it's just not meant to be. They'll just throw in the towel right away because they didn't really have to put skin in the game, but the reality is that hey, it's just not right now.

    Kisha: You have to be okay with that. I've never heard, I've never met any successful man or woman who went in at saying they were going to fail went in expecting to fail, and if it didn't work out them going, oh, they walked away. No, they went back and did it all over again. And maybe they did it better. They reinvented something. And so successful people plan, nothing happens by mistake. Right now, there are some things that happen by mistake and they're great mistakes, but for the most part, you have to plan, you have to plan for the ugly. You have to plan for the glitter, but when the ugly gets really ugly, like our ugly got really ugly. How did you keep it together? And so sometimes I'd be in the car crying. Sometimes I'd be in the studio behind the wall crying sometimes, you had to just figure it out

    Melissa: Right, and stick with it.

    Kisha: Yeah. You dont stop potty training your kid because they keep having a mess in their clothes. You have to potty train them.

    Melissa: It's true.

    Kisha: The same thing.

    Melissa: One thing that strikes me about your story is you found Jen and you had each other and that kind of special kismet. Do you think that happens for everybody? Do you think those people show up for everybody? Or what would you say to somebody that doesn't have Jen?

    Kisha: That's interesting. I do think that people, everybody comes into your life for a reason. For a reason and a season, right? Because you're people that you've known 10 years ago and you're like, oh, that was a really great person, really great friendship. But life has took you in different parts, they're people you've known your entire life, but I did not know that we were just gonna be together for a season. But in that learned so much from each other, took so much from each other. She probably gave me more than I could ever give her, but it was for the season. I wish I would- I think it should have ended so much more beautiful than the ugly, but that's how it was planned to end, unfortunately.

    Amy: And what is so beautiful about that story is that now she's carried on in so many ways. For people who have lost someone, you just feel her in different ways.

    And the people that, because she was very well known in the community as well. And now her kids are older and people know her kids from her and how proud she was as a mother and-

    Kisha: yeah, I've just learned to appreciate the season of why and when I have somebody. And just enjoy them, right?

    Amy: Yeah.

    Melissa: And it didn't stop you when you didn't have them either. It seems like you were able to face Dallas alone and face coming back alone and find new partners and new relationships.

    Kisha: Yeah. And like even my partner now. So my partner is Brenda and interesting story about Brenda is that, and I always tell her this and I realize, okay, she gotta make sure you say it differently and not to offend is that Jen picked Brenda.

    And I can remember we, she, honestly, I swear to you, she did the story goes, and this is how the real story is that Brenda used to run a studio in Detroit called Detroit Pilates. The pilates studio closed. And I remember seeing on social media, the studio closed. So I said to Jen, I was like, Hey Brenda Freeman, have you heard of her?

    She lives in Northville and her studio closed. So maybe we need another instructor. Cause at this point, like I'm needing some kind of help here. So I never met her, it just was over social media. So Jen reaches out to her. Jen has a conversation with her, Jen hires her. And I remember Jen said, I was like, Jen, we can't afford to pay her. And she goes, the money will come. Don't worry about it. The money will come. And so Jen hires her and it was like two weeks before I actually ever physically saw her and met her. And I was like, she's pretty, pretty cool person. Everything happens. And I go to Texas and Bob said why don't we have Brenda be our studio manager to help while you do the behind the scenes, she can do the front. So that's what we did. So this was 20- I don't know.

    Amy: Yeah, it's a blur. Let's call it what it is.

    Kisha: It's all about- it's the late 2020s,

    Amy: late 19 I don't know, teen's.

    Kisha: So she finally decides in December. Yeah, I really, I wanna buy into the business. So I asked Bob, do you want to sell your portion of the business or do you, what do you wanna do? And Bob says I'm not ready to let it go, and that means so many things, I'm not ready to let it go because it's Jens. I'm not ready to let it go in case Joanie wants it. I'm not ready to let it go. And so I was like, fine. No worries. Don't have to let it go. So Brenda was brought in to the business on, let's say like March 12th, 2020, what happens March 17,

    Amy: Everything shuts down, the sky falls.

    Kisha: So our promise to her was that you just paid all this money to go into a business. We're never gonna let you financially be in a pickle. And I think that she trusted us of that. We were not gonna let her financially struggle to where she just was okay with us. Like just this is where I'm supposed to be and latching on. So she's been, she's a wonderful partner. She's funny. She's inappropriate. Just like me. She's passionate. And it works.

    Amy: Yeah. It, I know you two if you look at you, both of you, like it's like, how do these two have some things in common, but I, although I've never met Brenda, I feel like I should have like forever go, cuz she just seems like this incredible woman, but she is- she's really, she seems like a true professional and she knows the craft of Pilates. And that's why Jen had her hand in that because you can't just pick somebody like, oh, I took a class one time and I, no, Brenda really knows her craft. I can just feel that and see it. And she walks the walk and talks the talk and that's the kind of partner that you need. And that's why I love how god works. because Brenda came into the path, and for those of you, wondering who Bob is Jen's husband, who is just an incredible man. And so tell us then where do things stand in terms of what is the current status of warehouse Pilates, and obviously the second studio is- it's your it's another kindling project because it's going to happen and that flame has been going for a while now. So tell us where things stand with that.

    Kisha: So I'm assuming in terms of when it's the opening, is that what you're asking me?

    Amy: Yeah. Can you throw, I know that, we're still in the path but like rough ish, like it's just gonna happen.

    Melissa: And what kind vision, what kind of vision do you have for it? What does it mean for a business to grow and how do you see it evolving? Because there's actually a big difference in my experience with that kind of growth, a big difference from one story to two stories,

    Kisha: One, I think things slow you down. So I got back in August. And Brenda and I are having a conversation like, okay we're gonna do this. We're gonna do this. So we start looking at locations in December. And so we pick a place like, okay, great. Let's go ahead and order equipment. And we can't order equipment because the supply chain. So once again, you're being slowed down and because at this point I've been slowed down so many times I don't get upset about it. I'm like, oh, there's a reason for that. Once again, god is telling me you're not, it's not ready. Not yet. Keisha, it's not ready. So we get on a wait list for equipment in February. We put the location on hold and we just wait. And then last week we get the email. It says, you can order your equipment. And I was like, oh, God says, I'm ready now. So now we're ready. We had to wait, you have to be patient. It, it happens. The studio will look the same as much the same as the first one in terms of the feeling, because we're trying to build something or we are building something that no matter where you go, if you go to this one or the next one or the third or fourth one, it always feels the same. Do you know, a lot of people will leave a fitness studio because of how it did or did not make them feel? It's not about the workout, it's how they feel in that space. And so you're still gonna have that same feeling. You're still having love and the protection of the instructors. We laugh in our classes. Sometimes they give me the stink eye because the class they're like, why are you killing us right now? But it's, it will be the same. It's just, we've duplicated made a carbon copy of it.

    Melissa: I love that.

    Amy: Yeah. So Keisha gosh, there were so many things that. Other things that I think we wanted to explore, but I feel like this is, has been incredibly meaningful, and I would ask you just one theme that I kept hearing is the word pivot. And this is something that has a lot of meaning in your journey as a business owner. And there's so much more than just owning something on paper. This is family, this is part of this is you on a cellular level. Yes. And so when we talk about pivoting, what are your thoughts that you could share with people who do have these maybe doubts or do have these self deprecating notions that, if it's hard work, then I just, I'm not gonna do it, and I don't know how to pivot or allow myself to pivot. How can that look?

    Kisha: Pivot is about survival, right? So if you think about it, If we feel ourselves tripping, we stick our hands out. So we don't smash our faces right. When you catch yourself. And that's what pivoting is. You don't wanna fall and smash your face. You're trying to just- it's about survival and it doesn't matter if you have to solve what you're surviving for.

    Is it, I need this to survive, to eat. I need this survive to pay my bills, or I need this to survive because I believe in it so much. It fills my spirit. And for me, the studio is about filling the emotional cup of so many people and, so that's why I've had to change when necessary. That's why I've had to turn a dime when necessary. That's why the business has had to turn when necessary, because it was a matter of survival, not for myself, but because so many clients are coming there and they're looking for it and they need it. If you only have one hour of your day for self care, I want that to be my space. I want them to come to us and I wanna make sure that one hour is the best one hour they have, because that may be the only hour they get, especially as mothers as women that we don't, we take care of everybody else. And so you have to decide what is your pivot? What is your reason? And my reason is that I know that we provide something good for the women that come there. And you have to also realize that pivot is change. And that's not a bad thing, it's a good thing. It allows you to see clearly allows you to see what you've done, but you're like, oh, I shouldn't have done that, Do that ever again. It allows you to do something new, but it's not a bad thing. Like we, if you walk in fear, you'll always live in fear, but it's you tell your kids when you see your kids riding their bicycle for their first time. We as parents will teach so much to our children, but we don't own it ourselves. So when they're riding their bike and they're on their training wheels and we take the training wheels off, we're telling them they have to trust that they can do it. It's the same thing for us.

    Amy: Yes.

    Melissa: Yep. Yep.

    Amy: So true.

    Kisha: You can't live in fear.

    Amy: Gosh, that's so profound and it's so true. And I love that you correlated pivot with surviving. I would've never tied those two together and I'm so glad you brought that up. And so that's something that I would really encourage people to think about is what does pivoting mean to really do some deep diving into what pivoting means and it is surviving. It is like you said, changing on a dime.

    It is- and that's, I think part of the kinship that I have felt with you all these years is that we can just be flexible. And that's not always easy because we do wanna hold onto things and we do want them to go a certain way, but over time you go through these life experiences and it's like, all right fine, message received. I will pivot all day long if I must, not always liking it, but this is what we have to do. And it just makes things more accepting in a lot of ways. And this is something that we have to go through really hard things to get to this point, though, this isn't something that we couldn't have this conversation in our twenties and say, oh yes. So no, this is something we earned our stripes for this.

    Melissa: But, also that Keisha shared, she still had her days where she cried in the car and she still had her days where she cried behind the wall. And I think it's super important to understand the change is inevitable. And sometimes the hurt is inevitable, but you are going to have to either get through it or not grow.

    Kisha: Yeah. And I think life is about planning too. So I can remember when we got to Texas and my child is struggling and it's hot as all get out, and I can't find a place to live. I'm living in an apartment and I'm like, I'm too old for this

    Amy: The dog. You had two dogs.

    Kisha: The dog. Oh my God, everything. Oh, there's scorpions. There're roaches. And I'm like, why am I here? So I'm not embarrassed to say this, but I am embarrassed to say this my best friend, it was that big bucket of peanut butter M&M's from Costco. And I would, as my doctor said, I would closet cry and eat peanut butter M&M's. Until I got in the scale one day and I'm like, I gotta find a whole new best friend

    Amy: One of the different consequences.

    Kisha: Gotta find a new best friend. And that's when I really just dug deep and started working out again in Texas because I all but stopped because I was such a mess. My life was a mess. I emotionally mentally and physically was a mess. And so that was when I threw away my best friend, slash peanut butter M&M's, and I just poured myself back into my working out. And that's where I found some of my really closest friends is from working out there that, I found a whole community.

    Amy: And that's so true. There's so much to be said for the community of, especially your studio. It's so intimate and it's personal. How many reformers are there? 18, 6, 10, 10. You're in a class with 10. That's a very intimate group. And I love that, that here's the thing you were where you were, you got really fit. You were fit before, but you got really fit in Texas.

    Melissa: Yeah. I have never seen a, not fit Keisha.

    Amy: Oh, I, I know her not,

    Melissa: I have also had a bucket of M&M's for friends, but people know that.

    Amy: There's no secrets there.

    Melissa: I think Keisha kinda wears it well.

    Kisha: Yeah. Ah, I think I just pack it in there. Little tiny corners use every crevice of my body.

    Amy: We all have corners and crevices.

    Kisha: But also I had to learn how to be happy with my exterior because unfortunately, lets just all be honest. As women, we have a tendency to surround ourselves with other women who are watching what we're eating. Guess what? It's my mouth I put in what I wanna put in it. And you don't get to tell me what I should look like.

    Amy: So true.

    Kisha: Think about it, it mentally plays on you when you're always trying to be something that genetically you're never gonna be. Physically, you're never gonna be it. Or lets just be honest, maybe I don't want to be a size two cause my head's gonna get big and my body's gonna be tiny. That's not cute. So it's critically important that we stop. We are just honest with ourselves. Be happy with ourselves. Be happy at whatever phase we're at because it's all a phase. It's all a cycle and just be happy with it. And I'm even in, in the space in the studio, you'll have women that come in, they're feeling self-conscious and it's- but you're here. The biggest step is that you're here and nobody is looking at you any differently except to applaud you for being here.

    Amy: Yeah.

    Kisha: And that's where we have to be.

    Amy: Yeah. And you disarm them too, you disarm them, you- look, you're taking class and then you're signing people in. You disarm these women that come in and help them feel welcome. Because that's really what exercise so much is about. Like you said, it's about connecting it's about community. It's about knowing, okay. If I got up for my early class, Then I can get through the day kind of thing. I know this is my mentality oftentimes, but Keisha there's so much more to, to say and to explore. I think this is a good place to to to put a pretty bow on it and just to say, thank you so much for being vulnerable with us and sharing sharing, some embers of your journey and-

    Melissa: I think it's gonna, I think it's really gonna resonate with a lot of people. Cause we all have these hardships, but keisha's story is particularly hard, but particularly triumphant that you're still doing it. I love it.

    Kisha: Yeah. We're still going. And don't get me wrong. Like the other day I was freaking out like, oh my God, you are really, as I told Ashley's our studio manager. I said, for nine months you talk about this baby, that's on the way. And then, oh my God, the baby's about to be born and you don't have a crib. The room's not painted you have nothing ready. And that's how I feel. Then I realized that you have everything you need. You've always had all the tools there. Yeah. It's just a matter of just digging them out and getting ready to go. So we're very excited. No more- I'm gonna have about four more meltdowns. Just so we're clear, that's gotta happen. And I'm okay with that. I'm expecting it. It's like I'm planning to have them. It's when you don't plan to have 'em that's when you don't know what to do with yourself, but I'm planning on it and poor Mike, he will have to listen to it.

    Amy: He needs to listen to it.

    Melissa: He needs to that's his job here, and thanks for sharing the story on the podcast, and Amy and I really invite you to share the story in our online community. And I know there are a lot of women that are dreaming of an exercise studio or a retail location or some other kind of business, and you're certainly a good example to follow.

    Kisha: I appreciate that. I dont know if I truly am, but I know that I come from a line of strong women and if I didn't hold up the line, then they might kick me out or kick me off, we're all so much stronger that we think we are, and you have to figure out which what's your why.

    Melissa: And that really sounds like that's what got you through. You had the right why.

    Kisha: Yeah. Yeah. And I do want my child, I want John Michael and I have two step daughters, two girls. I want them to see and know that you can build something on your own and you can do that. It's not without, it's not with some crazy high and sky notion you can do it.

    Amy: Yes. Yes. And I can only imagine the amount of clients slash students slash friends that you continue to inspire through your studio and all the new Students you're gonna have in the future, so when that time comes please let us know and we would love to have some activity in our kindling project ignite on our Facebook group. We know we have women from all over, but definitely from this area Southeast Michigan as well. Keisha, thank you so much. Thank you for showing up for us.

    Kisha: Thank you for having me and we'll have to do it again. You guys will have to come into the studio and we can do live feeds or wherever you guys will.

    Amy: Thank you so much. Not while on the reformer though, please. That might get a little, that might be a little too vulnerable.

    Melissa: Have a great day!

    Amy: Have a beautiful afternoon. Thank you so much.

    Melissa: Bye Keisha!

    Kisha: Bye Bye

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Overcoming mental health challenges

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